ISN'T IT A PAIN IN THE ARSE WHEN YOU HAVE TO SIT DOWN FOR AGES READING SOME CRAPPY SCROLLTEXT, BEFORE YOU GET TO SEE YOURSELF IN THE GREETINGS LIST!!! WELL qrstuvw HAS BUNGED THE GREETINGS LIST UP HERE, SO YOU WANT HAVE TO WAIT FOR ALL THE CRAP BELOW TO FINISH... ALL THE GREETINGS ARE IN NO SPECIAL ORDER (OTHER THAN A - Z), SO qrstuvw SENDS HEARTLY GREETINGS TO THE FOLLOWING GREAT TEAMS: ABC-KILLERS ACADAMY ACCESSION ACCUMULATORS ACID ACT ACTION FORCE AFTERBURNERS ALPHAFLIGHT AMIGA INDUSTRIES AMIGA ACTION ANC AXION BAMIGA SECTOR ONE (ERIC???) BEASTIE BOYS BENCOR BROTHERS (BILLY) BLACK MONKS BLIZZARD BYTE KILLERS CASCADE CLOUD 9 CRIME U.K. CRUSH CRYPTOBURNERS CULPRITS DEATHSTAR DEFJAM DESTINY DEXION DIGI TECH D.O.C. DOMINATORS EAGLE SOFT ECLIPSE EXCELL U.K. FASHION FIRST GENERATION FREE ACCESS FREESTYLE U.K. HCC HCS 1991 (THE AVENGER) HELLOWEEN HQC ICS IPEC ELITE INTRUDER IT! (BURGLAR) ITALIAN BAD BOYS JAT JEWELS JUNGLE COMMAND KEFRENS KNIGHT HAWKS LADS LIGHT CIRCLE LIGHTFORCE MAD MONKS MAGNIFICENT FORCE MASTER CREW MEGAVISION MIGHTY DRUIDS (NICK) MIRAGE U.K. (AXXION) NEUTRAL ZONE CRACKERS NEWSTYLE (TAG12) NLF NORTHERN LIGHTS NORTHSTAR AND FAIRLIGHT ORACLE PENTAGON PHALANX PHENOMENA PIRANHAS POWER DRIVE POWERLORDS POWERPRIDE PROPHETS AG QUADLITE QUARTEX RAINBOW CHAOS RAINMEN RAMTEK (JAGUAR) RANDOM ACCESS RAWFORCE RAZOR 1911 RED SECTOR SCOOPEX SCOUSE CRACKING GROUP SCT SAE/SCX SINNERS SLL SPREADPOINT (BIONIC) SPY AND MIND STACK AND THE X-MEN STEEL PULSE STIGA SYSTEM Z TEAM X TETRAGON THE FLASH TEAM THE BAND THE COPY CREW (KOEN) THE DREAM WARRIORS (EXERCIST) THE DRUIDS THE FALCON THE FALL GUY THE GOONIES THE MUTANT SQUAD THE NEW MASTERS THE RED DRAGON THE SILENTS THE SUPERVISORS THE WEB INC THREAT (FLAME) TOP SWAP TRILOGY TRISTAR TRONIC TSK CREW UNIT A VISION FACTORY AND THE BEYONDERS VORTEX 42 WIZARDS WORLD OF WONDERS (LARS) YES X-MEN U.K. XXX INTERNATIONAL XYZ SOFT AND ALL YOU OTHERS OUT THERE THAT qrstuvw MAY HAVE MISSED OFF THE LIST... OH WELL, THERE'S NOT MUCH TO TALK ABOUT (IF YOU WANT SOMETHING TO READ, THEN READ THE SCROLLTEXT BELOW), SO THEREFORE THIS GREETINGS LIST IS GOING TO WRAP-A-ROUND AND IF YOUR NAME WAS IN THE LIST, THEN YOU'LL BE ABLE TO SEE IT AGAIN, NOT BAD EHH!!! qrstuvw PRESENTS ANOTHER AMAZING DEMO.... RELEASE DATE 12/4/89.... CREDITS FOR THIS DEMO ARE AS FOLLOWS: CODING BY PHOTON.... GRAFIXX BY SNOWMAN.... THANX TO ALL THE GUYS WHO DUN THE GREAT MUZAK.... MEMBERS OF qrstuvw ARE: "PHOTON" "SNOWMAN" "TEKNICHIAN" "VELKRO" "PANTHER" "SENTINEL" AS YOU MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE NOTICED, qrstuvw HAS 2 NEW MEMBERS (PANTHER AND SENTINEL), SO DON'T FORGET THAT NOW THERE ARE 6!!!! NOW THAT THE FORMALITIES ARE OVER, IT'S TIME FOR A VERY IMPORTANT NOTICE: THE SCROLLTEXTS HAVE BEEN SPLIT UP INTO TWO SECTIONS, ABOVE IS WHERE YOU CAN FIND THE GREETINGS LIST (BUT I GUESS YOU KNOW THAT ALREADY, RIGHT???) AND HERE IS WHERE YOU CAN READ SCROLLTEXTS WRITTEN BY MEMBERS OF qrstuvw.... TO READ SCROLLTEXT FROM VARIOUS MEMBERS OF qrstuvw, PRESS ONE OF THE FOLLOWING KEYS: F1 FOR PHOTONS F2 FOR SNOWMANS F3 FOR TEKNICHIANS F4 FOR VELKROS F5 FOR SENTINELS F6 FOR PANTHERS IT'S NOT THAT HARD TO REMEMBER AND IF YOU FORGET, THEN SURELY YOU MUST BE A LAMER!!! THERE IS ALSO A SPEED CONTROL ON THIS TEXT (NOT THE ONE ABOVE) AND YOU USE THE MOUSEY TO CONTROL IT BY PRESSING: "LEFT" BUTTON : SPEED UP "RIGHT" BUTTON : SLOW DOWN GUESS WHAT, IF YOU SLOW THE TEXT DOWN ENOUGH, THEN YOU CAN PAUSE IT!!! HOW KIND??? CHOOSE MUZAK BY PRESSING "1" OR "2" OR "3" ANYWAY THIS SCROLLTEXT IS GETTING BORING SO WHY NOT PRESS ONE OF THE FUNCTION KEYS FOR SOME REAL FUN!!!! OH, BY THE WAY, HOLD DOWN BOTH MOUSEY BUTTONS TO EXIT THE DEMO, BUT I GUESS YOU WON'T DO THAT QUITE YET??? HOW'YA ALL DOIN TODAY, COZ IM FEELING JUST FINE??? WELL I CAN SEE THAT YOU'VE DIVED STRAIGHT FOR THE "F1" KEY, A LOGICAL CHOICE IF I MAY SAY SO, COZ NOW I CAN TELL YOU A FEW FACTS ABOUT THIS LITTLE DEMO THAT I'VE CODED (NO, WAIT!!! DONT PRESS ANOTHER KEY YET!!!)... THANKYOU... WELL THIS DEMO WAS CODED ON AN AMIGA FOR AN AMIGA, AND TOOK LONGER THAN EXPECTED TO CODE (DUE TO LOSING THE "DISK-VALIDATOR" A COUPLE OF TIMES!!!)... THE MUZAK FOR THIS DEMO WAS RIPPED FROM SOMEONE ELSES DEMO (LAMER, YOU MIGHT THINK, BUT AS YET WE STILL HAVE NO MUZICIAN!!! SO UNTIL WE FIND ONE, WE'LL JUST HAVE TO CARRY ON RIPPING!!! SORRY GUYS!!!)... I STARTED THIS SCROLLTEXT BEFORE I STARTED CODING THE DEMO, SO THEREFORE YOU IGNORE ALL THE ABOVE RUBBISH!!! OH WOW, YEAH AND HOOPY DOO!!! I'VE JUST BEEN TOLD THAT WE HAVE A MUZICIAN, NO SHIT!!! HIS NAMES "PANTHER" AND HE HAS LEFT RAMTEK TO JOIN US AT qrstuvw, SO WATCH OUT, COZ HE'LL BE DOING THE MUZAK FOR OUR FUTURE DEMOS... OH WELL I CAN SENSE THAT IM BORING YOU, SO I'LL STOP ALL THIS CRAP AND GET ON WITH SOMETHING INTERESTING, LIKE MYSELF... WELL, WHERE SHALL I START, THERES SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT, AND MY AMIGA'S ONLY GOT 1MB... OH, SOD IT!!! I WON'T BOTHER (SORRY TO DISAPPOINT YOU ALL BUT LIFE CAN BE A REAL BUMMER WHEN IT WANTS TO BE!!!)... HAS ANYONE READ THE "DISC-WORLD" BOOKS, WRITTEN BY "TERRY PRATCHETT", COZ THERE ABSOLUTELY (OR F--KING, FOR THE FOUL MOUTHED) GREAT!!! SO BEFORE I GO ANY FURTHER I SHALL TYPE IN PART OF THE STORY, SO HERE GOES... MORT'S FATHER AND UNCLE WATCHED MORT DISCONSOLATELY FROM THE STONE WALL. "WHAT I DON'T UNDERSTAND," SAID FATHER LEZEK, "IS THAT THE BIRDS DON'T EVEN FLY AWAY. I'D FLY AWAY, IF I SAW HIM COMING TOWARDS ME." "AH. THE HUMAN BODY'S A WONDERFUL THING. I MEAN, HIS LEGS GO ALL OVER THE PLACE BUT THERE'S A FAIR TURN OF SPEED THERE." MORT REACHED THE END OF THE FURROW. AN OVERFULL WOODPIGEON LURCHED SLOWLY OUT OF HIS WAY. "HIS HEART'S IN THE RIGHT PLACE, MIND" SAID LEZEK, CAREFULLY. "AH. COURSE, 'TIS THE REST OF HIM THAT ISN'T." "HE'S CLEAN ABOUT THE HOUSE. DOESN'T EAT MUCH," SAID LEZEK. "NO, I CAN SEE THAT." LEZEK LOOKED SIDEWAYS AT HIS BROTHER, WHO WAS STARING FIXEDLY AT THE SKY. "I DID HERE YOU'D GOT A PLACE GOING UP AT YOUR FARM, HAMESH," HE SAID. "AH. GOT AN APPRENTICE IN, DIDN'T I?" "AH," SAID LEZEK GLOOMILY, "WHEN WAS THAT THEN?" "YESTERDAY," SAID HIS BROTHER, LYING WITH RATTLESNAKE SPEED. "ALL SIGNED AND SEALED. SORRY. LOOK, I GOT NOTHING AGAINST YOU MORT, SEE, HE'S A NICE A BOY AS YOU COULD WISH TO MEET, IT'S JUST THAT-" "I KNOW, I KNOW," SAID LEZEK. "HE COULDN'T FIND HIS ARSE WITH BOTH HANDS." RIGHT THEN ENOUGH OF THAT, IF YOU WANT TO KNOW THE REST, THEN YOU'LL JUST HAVE TO BUY THE BOOK... SHIT IM GETTING DEPRESSED... THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS WHEN I HAVE TO TYPE IN SCROLLTEXT THAT MOST PEOPLE PROBABLY WON'T EVEN READ... TALKING ABOUT SCROLLTEXT, I WOUNDER HOW MUCH I'VE TYPED IN, HOLD ON A SECOND WHILE I WORK IT OUT. . . . . . . . . . 2672 BYTES... SHIT, THATS NOT ENOUGH, I GUESS I'LL BE AT THE KEYBOARD A LITTLE WHILE LONGER (WHAT DO YOU MEAN "OH NO!!!")... HOW MANY PEOPLE WILL BE GOING TO THIS YEARS "COMMODORE SHOW", ALL THOSE GOING RAISE YOUR HANDS NOW... WELL KISS MY HAIRY BOTTOM, IF YOUR ALL GOING, THEN IT'S GONNA BE A WELL'ARD SHOW!!! NEADLESS TO SAY, ALL MEMBERS OF qrstuvw ARE GOING TO BE THERE (WITH THE EXCEPTION OF "TEKNICHIAN", WHO'S GOT EXAMS THE NEXT DAY, HA!! HA!!), SO WE'LL HOPE TO SEE SOME OF YOU GUYS DOWN THERE!!! OH WELL I THINK IT'S TIME FOR A CHANGE OF COLOUR, HOW ABOUT PURPLE??? YEAH!!! WHY NOT!!! SINCE YOU'VE MANAGED SO SIT AND READ ALL THIS SHIT BY ME, I SHALL LET YOU INTO A SMALL SECRET, "THERE IS A HIDDEN MESSAGE WITHIN THIS DEMO, AND IF YOU FIND THE RIGHT COMBINATION OF KEYS THEN SURELY YOU WILL BE ABLE TO READ IT, BUT DON'T TELL ANYONE ELSE"... OH NO!!! CAFFINE ATTACK!!! THE KETTLE HAS BOILED AND I CAN SMELL THE CAFFINE FROM HERE SO IM GONNA MAKE MYSELF A CUPPA, ANYONE ELSE WANT ONE, IF SO, PAUSE THE SCROLLTEXT AND HURRY UP!!!. . . . . . . . . . . AH BACK AGAIN!!! WITH ONE MUG OF "NESCAFE" (A SMALL PLUG, WHICH I DOUBT I'LL GET PAID FOR, BASTARDS!!!)... BY THE WAY, DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW TO DEAL WITH A MONITOR THAT HAS A SERIOUS ATTITUDE PROBLEM??? COZ RECENTLY MY MONITOR HAS DEVELOPED A SENSE OF HUMOUR AND WHENEVER IM CODING OR PLAYING A GAME (YES, I PLAY GAMES IN BETWEEN CODING, SLEEPING AND GOING TO THE TOILET), IT DECIDES TO WHINE, HUM, OR CRACKLE AT ME, SOMETIMES IT EVEN TURNS THE SOUND OFF (WHICH REALLY PISSES ME OFF, WHEN YOUR TRYING TO LISTEN TO A REALLY GOOD BIT OF MUZAK)... I'VE TRIED TO REASON WITH IT, BUT IT JUST IGNORES ME, I'VE TRIED HITTING IT, BUT IT JUST GETS WORSE. MAYBE I SHOULD DIVOURSE IT OR GIVE IT MEDICAL TREATMENT, WHO KNOWS??? WELL WHERE REALLY GETTING INTO THE SWING OF THINGS NOW, IT'S A WONDER WHAT CAFFINE DOES FOR THE MIND (AND THE SOLE???)... SHIT ONLY A FEW DAYS AWAY FROM RELEASE AND I'VE SPENT MORE TIME ON THIS SHITTY SCROLLTEXT THAN I HAVE CODING THIS DEMO, BUT SHUSHHH!!! DON'T TELL THE OTHER MEMBERS OR THEY'LL KILL ME... HA!!! HA!!! ARE YOU EYES HURTING FROM SITTING INFRONT OF THE MONITOR (OR TELEVISION), COZ IF THEY ARE THEN YOU HAD BETTER CLOSE THEM, COZ I'M ABOUT TO FUCK THEM UP EVEN MORE... HOW??? YOU MIGHT SAY!!! LIKE THIS!!! WOW A STROBE EFFECT!!! OH WELL, THAT WAS FUN... AS YOU HAVE NOTICED I HAVE RUN OUT OF THINGS TO TALK ABOUT AND THATS WHY I'M JUST TYPING A LOAD OF CRAP TO FILL UP MEMORY!!! OH SOD THIS, I'M GOING TO BED!!! GOODNIGHT!!! SHIT IT'S NOT EVEN MIDNIGHT, I'LL NEVER GET TO SLEEP THIS EARLY!!! OH WELL I'M GOING TO HAVE TO END MY SCROLLTEXT NOW, BUT HOW SHALL I END IT??? HOW ABOUT BYYYEEEE!!! NO THATS LAME!!! SO HOW ABOUT BYE'Z'BYE UNTIL THE NEXT TIME!!! OH BEFORE I GO, I'LL JUST INCLUDE MY ADDRESS (YOU NEVER KNOW, SOMEONE MIGHT WRITE TO ME???), SO GET READY TO SLOW THE SCROLLTEXT DOWN, COZ HERE IT COMES: 10 STEPHENS GARDENS LITTLE SUTTON CHESHIRE L66 4QA ENGLAND IF YOU CANT WRITE, THEN MAYBE YOU'LL WANT TO PHONE, BUT ONLY PHONE BETWEEN 6:00PM AND 11:00PM (ENGLISH TIME!!!) DURING THE WEEK DAYS, SO HERES THE NUMBER: ENGLAND 339 - 3874 WELL THATS ABOUT ALL FOR NOW, SO FAREWELL AND UNTIL THE NEXT TIME.... SIGNED: PHOTON (CODER) HMMMM... HERE I AM! THE SNOWMAN NOW BRINGS YOU HIS SCROLLY BIT. THE MUSIC IS LOUD, THE HOUSE IS EMPTY, AND THE BEER IS COOL. RIGHT... LETS GO! THE DAY TODAY IS EASTER FRIDAY, AND ALL MY FAMILY ARE OUT DOWN THE PUB GETTING PLASTERED, I WOULD BE TOO, BUT I CAN'T AFFORD TO AFTER THE COLLEGE DO I JUST WENT TO - WEST CHESHIRE COLLEGE. WE HAVE A DO EVERY ONCE AND A WHILE, AND BELIVE ME, EVERYTHING YOU HAVE HEARD ABOUT STUDENT DO'S AND PARTIES ARE..... VERY VERY TRUE! WOW! I HAVEN'T REALLY RECOVERED YET. OF COURSE THERE WAS THE CUSTOMARY PUB CRAWL.... BUT MORE OF THAT LATER IN THE TEXT...... NOW LETS TRY OUT SOME OF THE FUNCTIONS, AND SPECIAL CHARS I HAVE BEEN GIVE A LIST OF... COLOUR CHANGE... COLOR 1... COLOR 2... COLOR 3... LETS TRY A STROBE EFFECT... THE SNOWMAN GREAT EH??? PLEASE DON'T TURN OFF THIS SCROLLTEXT, READ IT THROUGH (IT'S THE BEST ONE OF THE BUNCH!) IF YOU GET BORED, JUST SPEED UP THE SCROLL AND READ THE BITS YOU DO LIKE! OK !!!! DEFAULT COLOUR...... RIGHT JUST A FEW WARNINGS BEFORE WE START... IF YOU DECIDE TO READ PAUL'S (PHOTON'S) SCROLLTEXT, THEN GET THE SPEED VERY VERY FAST... AND DON'T READ THE BOOK QUOTATION! YOU HAVE BEEN TOLD!!!! RIGHT... A QUICK SORT OF MY ROOM AND I'M READY TO GO.... THE DATE : 1ST APRIL (I AM THE LAST MEMBER TO GIVE THEIR SCROLLTEXT IN!) THE SHADOWS IN THE BACKGROUND (WHAT DO YOU MEAN, WHAT SHADOWS? - TURN UP YOUR BRIGHTNESS TO SEE THEM. ALL OF YOU EDUCATED PEOPLE WILL KNOW THAT IT COMES FROM THE COVER OF 'SONGS TO LEAN AND SING' BY ECHO AND THE BUNNYMEN, THOSE OF YOU THAT DIDN'T... DO NOW! I AM INCIDENTLY A GREAT E AND THE B MEN FAN, ALONG WITH THE CURE, ICICLE WORKS, JOY DIVISION ETC... (ONLY THE BEST KIND OF MUSIC!) ALL THE OTHER GFX IN THE DEMO IS BY ME ALSO, UNLESS I DO NOT GET THE CHANCE TO DESIGN THE EQUALIZER SURROUND, IN WHICH CASE IT WILL BE PHOTON'S EFFORT (HA HA HA HA HA!) SO DON'T GET ANY IDEAS THAT I DREW IT! IN CASE YOU HADN'T NOTICED, THE CHARSET IS THE SAME AS THE LAST DEMO, BUT WITH A DIFFERENT FILL ON IT! (LAZY EH?) I AM SO SICK OF SEEING THE KNIGHTHAWKS FONT THAT I SCREAM WHEN I SEE A DEMO WITH IT !!! WHY NOT DRAW ANOTHER? OHH IT MAKES ME SO MAD! ( I DO CONTRACT GRAPHIC WORK FOR ANY TEAMS INTERESTED? - CONTACT ADDRESS AT END OF SCROLL (REASONABLE RATES!!! ) ) THE LOGO BOUNCING ROUND WAS DRAWN OVER A PERIOD OF 30 MINS (RUSH JOB!) AND I THINK IS PRETTY GODDAM AWFUL! BUT THE OTHER MEMBERS LIKE IT SO... I TAKE NO CREDIT FOR THE GRAPHICS ON THE STARFIELD! (??) HA HA... ENOUGH OF GRAPHICS AND TO BEER. STILL THERE? GOOD! WHAT IS YOUR DRINK? CHAOS ARE MOSTLY MILD DRINKERS WITH THE CLI WIZ DRINKING LAGER!(YUK!) THERE IS ONLY ONE PROBLEM WITH DRINKING MILD.... THE MORE YOU DRINK.... THE DRUNKER YOU GET (NO, NOT THAT PROBLEM!) OH YES, THE MORE YOU DRINK, THE MORE WIND YOU SUFFER FROM! WOW! DOES THAT SMELL! I WENT OUT THE OTHER WEEK WITH A MATE AND STAYED IN A PUB ALL DAY IN CHESTER, AND THAT NIGHT I FARTED A LOT! WHEN I WOKE UP ALL THE WALLPAPER HAD TURNED BROWN AND PEELED OFF, AND THE CAT HAD DIED WHILST TRYING TO GET OUT OF THE DOOR!!! HA HA ! TALKING OF CATS, PUT UP YOUR HANDS THE CAT OWNERS!............ GOOD, A FELINE AUDIENCE! MY CAT HA JUST TOOK UP THE HABIT OF WALKING ALONG THE CLOTHES LINE AND PULLING OUT THE PEGS SO THE WASHING FALLS ON THE FLOOR. (IT DISCOVERED IF IT BIT THE PEG AT THE TOP, IT OPENED AND FELL OFF! ) THE ONLY THING THAT WORRIES ME ABOUT THIS IS THAT IF SHE DOES IT IN OUR GARDEN.... WHAT ABOUT OTHERS???? HMMMM. I HAD SOMETHING ELSE TO MENTION BUT I HAVE FORGOTTEN NOW!.. OH WELL, REMEMBER THAT PUB CRAWL I MENTIONED? YES? GOOD, HERE IT IS.................. AT THE LAST COLLEGE DO WE (A COUPLE OF LAGER LOUT MATES) MANAGED 10 PUBS, AND WERE THEN DRAGGED INTO THE NIGHTCLUB EARLY BY A COUPLE OF FEMALES WHO WERE AFTER MY BODY (DIDN'T YOU KNOW I AM INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE?) - MODEST AS WELL! SO THIS TIME WE VOWED TO BEAT THE RECORD SO STARTED AT 6:30 INSTEAD OF 7:00PM. WE TOOK A TAXI TO THE WHITE HORSE, STAYED FOR A COUPLE OF SWIFT 'WARM UP' PINTS! THEN DOWN TO THE GROSVENER INN, THEN TOOK A SWIFT WALK TO THE SHIP INN (JESUS, WHAT A DIVE!), THEN.... WAAIIITT!!! DID I MENTION WINNING EVRYONE IN THE HORSE AND GROSVENER AT POOL ? ? ... WELL, I DID... (DID I NOT MENTION I WAS INCREDIBLY GOOD AT POOL?) ANYWAY, ON WITH THE CRAWL.... NEXT WAS THE BEAR AND BILLET (THE DRUGS CAPITAL OF CHESTER NOW THAT THE GEORGE AND DRAGON HAS BEEN RAIDED AND SHUT DOWN!) AFTER TURNING DOWN SOME POT AND SPEED WE SPED ON TO THE CROSS KEYS (WHERE, SURPRISE! THE MILD WAS OFF SO THEY HAD TO CHANGE IT - IS THERE SOMTHING WITH THE MILD IN PUBS THAT MEANS IT IS ALWAYS OFF? ALWAYS? SEARCH ME) ANYWAY, AFTER AFTER AN HOUR (OR SO) WAIT, WE GOT OUR DRINKS, TOLD SOME DIRTY JOKES AND WENT ON TO THE GOLDEN EAGLE. NICE PUB THE EAGLE. NEXT WAS THE KINGS HEAD. JESUS CHRIST! (NO I'M NOT RELIGIOUS, JUST FOUL MOUTHED!) THE KIDS IN THAT PLACE! RIGHT OUT OF KINDERGARDEN MOST OF EM'! (A BIT OF GERMAN FOR OUR GERMAN FRIENDS!) SO WE INSULTED A FEW, COMMENTED ON A FEW HORRENDOUS TIES, INVOKED A FIGHT, AND LEFT.... NEXT WAS CLAVERTONS.... WE MISSED CLAVERTONS - THEY DON'T SERVE MILD..... NEXT WAS THE FALCON, WHAT A.... NON-DISCRIP PUB. AFTER A QUICK MEETING OF OTHER STUDENTS, AND A JOINING OF FORCES, WE STUMBLED DOWN THE ROAD TO YE OLDE VAULTS. I MUST SAY, THE REGULARS WERE REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY HAPPY TO SEE US! HA! AFTER MUCH BRAWLING AND SHOUTING WE LEFT.... NEXT WAS THE QUEEN VIC ON THE ROWS, THEN YE OLDE DEVA (NEXT DOOR) AFTER A SHORT REST IN YE OLDE DEVA, WE TOOK A LONG WALK TO THE OLD QUEENS HEAD (ANOTHER KIDDIE'S PUB)... WHERE.... WE HAD MISSED EVERYONE ELSE. SO WE HAD A QUICK PINT THERE (WELL, MORE SLOW REALLY - WERE WE GETTING RATHER DRUNK YOU KNOW!).. NEXT WE STUMBLED DOWN THE ROAD TO THE CITY INN. I HAD A NASTY EXPERIENCE IN THE CITY INN... AS I WAS COMING OUT OF THE TOILET (PRETTY FREQUENTLY) I HELD THE DOOR OPEN FOR SOME GUY COMING IN, EXCEPT I DIDN'T... MY FINGER SLIPPED INTO THE THE GAP THAT THE DOOR CLOSES AGAINST... AND THE DOOR SWUNG CLOSED.......... OWWW! PAIN! THE GUY LAUGHED AS I RECALL, IN FACT, SO DID ALL MY MATES! - MY FINGER IS STILL BLUE. NOW WE WERE GETTING DRUNK! NEXT STOP... ODDFELLOWS ARMS.. WELL, I AM BEGGINING TO FORGET DETAILS NOW! WE DRUNK (I REMEMBER THAT).. NOW THE NEXT PART IS ON THE ASSURANCE FROM 'FRIENDS'.. WE WENT TO EVERGREENS AND DRUNK SOME MORE. WHAT NEXT? SEVERAL HOURS OF SWEATLY DANCING AND DRINKING INSIDE THE NIGHTCLUB... ALL I REMEMBER IS TELLING SOME TOTAL STRANGER ALL MY DARKEST SECRETS, AND STARTING SEVERAL BRAWLS INSIDE THE CLUB... THEN IT WAS 2AM. WE LEFT THE CLUB AND WENT FOR A DONER KEBAB EACH. MMMMMMM! (I THINK?) THEN IT WAS INTO A TAXI, BIMBLE BACK TO A MATES DRINK A FEW CANS OF (BLEAH! DARE I SAY IT? STELLA!) AND CRASH OUT WHERE YOU FALL TIME! FUNNILY ENOUGH... I HAD A HANGOVER THE NEXT MORNING.. ( WHAT I HEAR YOU CRY! - YOU GOT UP? ) YES, YES, SORRY IN THE AFTERNOON WHEN I GOT UP... WELL, THIS CAN TEACH YOU ONLY TWO THINGS.... (1) CHESTER IS PACKED FULL OF PUBS.... AND (2) BECOME A STUDENT TOMORROW, AND (3) (YES, I LIED) COME DOWN AND SEE ME FOR A GOOD NIGHT OUT ON THE TOWN (OR ANY FEMALES WATCHING - MY BEDROOM HAS JUST BEEN DECORATED) WELL ENOUGH OF PUBS AND BEER..... (REALLY?) NOW LETS GET SEMI-SERIOUS! ...... END OF PUB CRAWL SECTION (I WROTE THIS A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO).... JUST A NOTE..... ANYONE THAT PLEASES IS WELCOME TO ANY GFX IN THIS DEMO, AS LONG AS YOU GIVE CREDIT WHERE CREDIT IS DUE. OH YES, AND AN APOLOGY! THE LAST DEMO.... HMMMMM.. THE GRAPHICS WERE DONE BY ME... BUT, THE COLOURS WERE NOT!!! NO, PHOTON DECIDED TO PUT HIS OWN COLOURS INTO THE SCROLL CHAR SET! HA HA HA !!! THE ORIGINAL COLOURS WERE A DARK BROWN AND GOLD COLOUR, BUT I SUPPOSE PHOTON KNOWS WORST! IN THIS DEMO,( I HASTEN TO ADD ) I SUPERVISED THE COLOURS MYSELF! THIS SCROLL TEXT IS SLOWING TO A HALT NOW! I AM SORRY IF IT HAS SEEMED A LITTLE JERKY, BUT IT HAS ALL BEEN WRITTEN OVER A WEEK OR SO, AND JUST BUNGED TOGETHER TODAY...... NOW MY CONTACT ADDRESS!........... ANY CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISISM, CONTRACT WORK OR JUST PLAIN PRAISE AND CRAWLING CAN BE GOTTEN TO ME THROUGH THE FOLLOWING ....... READY? GET A PEN OR SOMETHING!................. RIGHT, THE SNOWMAN 18 PALM GROVE E/PORT L66 2PU (OR PHONE 6PM - 11:30PM) U.K. 051 355 3564 OK, IF YOU REVERSE THE CHARGES, OR CHEAT SO I GET THE BILL, I WILL SAVE THE PETROL MONEY, AND COME AND SEE YOU! (DID YOU KNOW I OWN A BASEBALL BAT SPECIALY SAVED FOR LAMERS WHO CALL ME AT 2AM FROM NORWAY ASKING IF HAVE OPERATION WOLF YET, AND DO YOU WANT ANY MORE CONTACTS!) AAAARRRRRRGGGHHH! JESUS! THOSE PEOPLE PISS ME OFF! CHANGE OF SUBJECT: REAM... I AM SURE THEY WON'T BE READING NOW.. SO I CAN TALK ABOUT THEM!! ... DO YOU KNOW THEM? THEY USED TO BE CALLED R.G.B. ! GOOD NAME EH? APPARENTLY THEY TRIED TO LEARN TO CODE, BUT IT WAS TOO HARD, SO THEY ARE NOW LEARING 'C' INSTEAD...... WELLL..... HAVE YOU TRIED TO LEARN 'C' ??? NO, NOR HAVE I! HA HA HA HA HA! I MUST NOW SAY A CUSTOMARY FEW HELLOS AND MESSAGES BEFORE I GO...... y BUZZAW. THANKS FOR DEVOTING A BIT OF SCROLLTEXT TO ME IN ONE OF YOUR RECENT DEMOS. VERY NICE, THOUGHT I WOULD RETURN THE COMPLIMENT. SAY HI TO ALL THE MEMBERS OF IT FOR ME. HOW IS MARIANNE?? TELL HER TO WRITE SOON. OK? THANKS MATEY! y SHAUN (ODIN) FROM DOWN SOUTH.. HELLO MATEY! ARE YOU GOING TO THE COMMODORE SHOW THIS YEAR? BECAUSE I AM. (ALL THE REST OF YOU LISTEN TO THIS AS WELL) ALL OF qrstuvw ARE GOING TO THE SHOW, WE WILL BE WEARING BADGES WITH 'qrstuvw ' ON THEM... STOP US AND TALK. WE ARE FRIENDLY GUYS ( WE WILL PROBABLY BE IN THE BAR, OK? ) ANYWAY SHAUN, I WILL GIVE YOU A RING NEARER THE DATE AND ARRANGE A MEETING PLACE. y ICE. THANKS FOR ASKING AFTER ME VIA TPM, AND I AM DOING OK CODING WISE, HOW ARE YOU DOING? GOOD. MAY SEE YOU SOME TIME EH? y A TEAM CALLED CRUSH, THAT ARE WEST GERMAN, AND ALL FEMALE.... ARE YOU A LEGEND? IF YOU EXIST.. WRITE TO ME! ALL OF YOU! HA HA HA! ALL FEMALE! GIBBER GIBBER! IT NOWS SEEMS THAT I AM DRYING UP IN MY MESSAGES AND SCROLLTEXT. I AM STARTING TO RAMBLE... OH YES, ONE LAST MESSAGE TO DEATHSTAR.. REMEMBER ME? SORRY ABOUT NEVER SENDING SOME STUFF, BUT I BECAME BUSY WITH NEW TEAM WORK OVER THIS END OF THE WORLD. LOOKING AT THIS DEMO.... AREN'T YOU GLAD? JESUS! I WOULD BE! HA HA! OK, BEFORE YOU PRESS ANOTHER KEY AND READ THE TEKNICHIAN'S SCROLLY, WAIT A MOMENT.... I JUST WANT TO SAY GOODBYE FOR NOW....... GOODBYE FROM THE SNOWMAN ............(234 LINES ON DEVPAC - HEE HEE!)............................................................. }}}}}} HI THERE !! - I WELCOME YOU TO SOME SCROLL TEXT WRITTEN BY ME ( THE TEKNICHIAN) WELL qrstuvw HAVE DONE IT AGAIN, ONCE MORE, ANOTHER BRILLIANT DEMO HAS BEEN CODED TO EXTREME QUALITY. I NEEDN'T SAY WHO THE CREDITS GO TO AS I'M SURE THEY'VE BEEN AND GONE ALREADY. BEFORE I PROCEED IN MY TEXT I MUST FIRST MAKE AN ANNOUNCEMENT : THE MUSIC FROM OUR LAST DEMO WAS -NOT- WRITTEN BY FROG OF DOC BUT WAS ACTUALLY WRITTEN BY WALKMAN OF PHALANX (NOW A MEMBER OF IT). I HOPE THIS WILL MAKE UP FOR THE MISTAKE CABLE/PHALANX AND THANKS FOR POINTING IT OUT TO US. WELL "THE SNOWMAN" HAS JUST TOLD ME THAT HIS SCROLL TEXT IS BIGGER THAN MINE, WELL NOT FOR LONG!!! I FIND IT NO PROBLEM IS RAMBLING ON TALKING SHIT, SO THIS SCROLL TEXT IS GOING TO BE ABSOLUTELY MASSIVE. HEY ! WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS CHAR }}}}}}}}}}} ?????? IS IT AMAZING OR WHAT ??? (IT WAS OF COURSE NICELY DRAWN BY THE SNOWMAN) ~~~~~~~~~~~ WHAOOHHHH!! WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ?!?! WAS IT A SNOWMAN BY ANY CHANCE ?????? NAH ! COULDN'T BE COULD IT ?? I HAVE JUST BEEN INFORMED THAT IT WAS A SNOWMAN ! (DRAWN BY THE SNOWMAN - CONFUSING OR WHAT ?) THE MUSIC WITH THIS DEMO SHOULD BE WRITTEN BY PANTHER, BUT IT MAY NOT BE READY IN TIME !! HEY PANTHER IF THE MUSIC IS GOOD THEN I'LL TALK TO THE OTHER MEMBERS ABOUT YOUR MEMBERSHIP (IF YOU WANT TO THAT IS !). SINCE I DON'T KNOW IF PANTHER WILL JOIN US THEN I WILL STATE THAT WE STILL NEED MUSICMEN(OR WOMEN) - PREFERABLY OF GOOD QUALITY ! IF YOU CAN HELP US OUT THEN PLEASE GET IN CONTACT WITH ONE OF US OR SEND A SAMPLE. DOES ANYBODY OUT FEEL LIKE GIVING ME A MODEM ?? (2400 OR 9600 BAUD OF COURSE !)- IF SO THEN PLEASE AND I STRESS THE PLEASE SEND IT TO ME !!!! THIS WILL OF COURSE NEVER HAPPEN BUT YOU NEVER KNOW WHO'S GOING TO READ THIS -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- WELL NO TIME TO MESS ABOUT SO ON WE GO ............................ - DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU CANT USE A 'PHREAKING BOX' ON THE 'X SYSTEM' IN BRITIAN ???, IF YOU DO USE ONE THEN YOU CAN BE CAUGHT/TRACED BY THE HIGHER AUTORITIES !! (POLICE) . THE SYSEM WHICH YOU CAN USE THE BOX ON IS THE BELL ONE (COGS AND LEVERS, IN SIMPLE TERMS THE OLD ONE) I GUESS MOST OF YOU COOL PHREAKERS KNOW THIS ALREADY. -- THIS INVALUABLE INFORMATION WAS SUPPLIED TO ME BY 'THE DISK DOCTOR' (THANKS MATE !). IF YOU KNOW OF OTHER CIRCUIT DIAGRAMS FOR 'PHREAK BOXES' THEN PLEASE GIVE ME A CALL !! (ONLY IF THEY WORK !!). TODAY I GOT UP TO THE CALL OF THE POSTMAN (IN OTHER WORDS THE DOORBELL) - HE HANDED ME SEVERAL BILLION PACKAGES (WELL REALLY IT WAS 8 PACKAGES), I IMMEDIATELY PROCEEDED TO OPEN THEM ONE BY ONE. LOOKING CAREFULLY I NOTICED A THICK LETTER AMOUNG SOME DISKS - WOW I THOUGHT, A LETTER (USUALLY I GET THE CLASSIC HI AND GOODBYE ROUTINE ON A BIT OF SCRAPPY PAPER (TOILETY LOOKING!) - BUT THIS WAS DIFFERENT !!! -- I OPENED THIS WEIGHTY INSTRUCTION MANUAL LOOKING THING, TO FIND IT WAS A LETTER BY 'THE EXORCIST OF THE DREAM WARRIORS' (MY GOOD MATE PAUL!). PREVIOUSLY I HAD HELD THE STUPID MINI-RECORD OF THE LONGEST LETTER BETWEEN US. THESE IDIOTIC AND TIME WASTEFUL LETTERS HAD STARTED SINCE WE STARTED SWAPPING WAY BACK IN JANUARY 1989 - IT SEEMED LIKE GOOD FUN BUT THEN IT GOT PRETTY BAD, THE TIME INVOLVED IN WRITING A SINGLE LETTER GREW FROM A FEW SECONDS TO 40-60 MINUTES ! I HAD WROTE A MAMOUTH LETTER OF SEVEN SIDES OF A4 SIZE PAPER AND SO HAD THE RECORD (FOR JUST A WHILE THOUGH) - IN RESPONSE THIS IS WHAT I GOT , A 10 PAGER !!!! - - - - - AND SO THE MINI-RECORD IS NOW THE PITTYFULL PRIDE OF 'THE EXORCIST/TDW' BUT JUST YOU WAIT PAUL, I'M GONNA KNOCK THAT PATHETIC RECORD TO PIECES WHEN I GET THE TIME AND THE IDEAS !!!!!! (YOU ARE WARNED !!!) OH WELL THAT LITTLE STORY WASTED A FEW KBYTES OF SCROLLTEXT (SORRY PAUL!) AND NOW ONTO SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT, THIS DEMO !!!!!!! DO YOU LIKE IT ????? MY CONTRIBUTION TO THIS MEGAPRODUCTION WAS ALL OF THIS BULLSHIT SCROLLTEXT (WHICH HAS PROBABLY BORED YOU TO DEATH BY NOW!) - IT IS HAPPENING AGAIN , MY BRAIN CELLS HAVE DECIDED TO STOP ALL THINKING ABILITIES (THIS OFTEN HAPPENS) AND SO I'LL HAVE A SMALL BREAK ----------------------------------------------- NOW ONTO OTHER THINGS ........... SOME MESSAGES TO SOME REAL DUDES AND FRIENDS THAT I KNOW ........... : FIRST ONE GOES TO A REAL PHONE-FREAK (NO NOT YOU THE EXORCIST/THE DREAM WARRIORS - YOU COME A LITTLE LATER) ERRR WHERE WAS I, YEAH THAT'S RIGHT ONTO SOME MESSAGES : THAT PHONE-FREAK WHICH I WAS ON ABOUT IS CALLED 'GANDALF FROM THE DRUIDS' - SO HERE WE GO: HI GANDALF, HO YA DOIN' MATE ??? - WELL THANKS FOR THE UMPTEEN BILLION DISKS THAT YOU'VE SENT ME OVER THE LAST COUPLE OF MONTHS AND OF COURSE THANKS FOR THE DEEP SCAN BURST NIBBLER - YOU SENT IT REAL QUICK !!. WELL I SAID I'D MENTION YOU IN OUR LATEST DEMO AND HERE IT IS (ALL COUPLE HUNDREAD BYTES WORTH). WELL I'LL POST THIS DOWN TO YOU WHEN IT'S ALL FINISHED BUT AT THE MOMENT I'VE GOT SOME GUY SITTING NEXT TO ME ASKING REAL STUPID QUESTIONS SO I'LL JUST SORT HIM OUT NOW .................................... I BETTER BE NICE TO HIM AS HE'S JUST MENTIONED A GREAT MONEY MAKING IDEA. ONTO THOSE MESSAGES AGAIN: HI THERE THE EXORCIST/THE DREAM WARRIORS, HERE'S YOUR SPECIAL MENTION !!! - THANX MATE FOR ALL THE GOOD STUFF AND ALL THOSE GREAT LONG PHONECALLS, I HOPE THOSE MEGA LONG LETTERS ARE READABLE BUT YOU KNOW I HAVE LITTLE TIME TO MESS ABOUT. ARE YOU GOING TO COME UP THIS SUMMER ???? IF NOT THEN I'LL HAVE TO COME DOWN TO YOURS (IF YOU'LL LET ME STAY THAT IS). OK THAT'S ALL FOR YOU THE EXORCIST/THE DREAM WARRIORS (YOU'VE HAD ENOUGH MENTION IN THIS SCROLLY!!). ANOTHER MESSAGE TO 'AXXION/MIRAGE U.K.' : THANX FOR ALL THE CONSTANT STUFF, AT THIS MOMENT I HAVEN'T SEEN THE NEW DEMOS SO PLEASE SEND THEM UP WHEN THEY ARE RELEASED. MESSAGE TO 'LARS/WORLD OF WONDERS' : HI ! WELL AS YOU CAN SEE THIS IS WHAT WE'VE BEEN DOING LATELY AND SO WHY THE DEMO FOR 'HI-VOLTAGE' WILL BE A BIT LATE. EVERYTHING IS EXPLAINED IN THE PACKAGE. MESSAGE TO: MARC/EXCELL U.K. : HI ! GREAT SENDINGS, BUT WHAT A PITY ABOUT YOUR DEMO - NAH JUST JOKING ! IT WAS GREAT !(HONEST!) MESSAGE TO: SHARK THE MASTER/SCOOPEX : HEY THAT LAST SEND WAS A LOOOOONG ONE ! THOUGHT YOU WERE GONE ON HOLIDAY OR SOMETHING ?!?!?THANKS FOR THE SPECIAL GREET, DID IT HAVE TO BE THE LAST IN THE RANKED ORDER ??? MESSAGE TO: T.I.W./SHARE AND ENJOY/SCOOPEX : HI YOU MEGA 'VIZ' FREAK ! , PLEASE SEND UP YOUR LATEST CREATIONS AND THAT ROBOCOP MUSIC DONE BY ZING (I THINK !?!). AM I INVITED TO THE COPY PARTY ??? (THINK ABOUT IT!) MEESSAGE TO: KOEN/THE COPY CREW : HI KOEN - YOU GET THIS A LITTLE LATE, IT ALL DEPENDS ON WHEN THE 10 DISKS COME BACK. SORRY IT LOOKS LIKE WE MAY NOT BE COMMING OVER IN 1990 DUE TO RESPONSIBILITIES. !BUT! MAYBE SOME DAY !!!! MESSAGE TO: THE DISK DOCTOR (RORY) : HI-YA MATEY ! - WELL HAVEN'T SENT ANYTHING LATELY MAINLY BECAUSE OF OVERWORK (COPYING CAN BE REAL FUN SOMETIMES) AND PROBLEMS HAVE BEEN BECOMING APPARENT. SO I'LL START SOME TIME IN THE FUTURE (DON'T LOSE CONTACT !). MESSAGE TO : NEWSTYLE : HEY ROY WHERE ARE YOU MAN ! - YOU ONLY LIVE ACCROS THE WATER ! -, HOPE NOTHING SHITTY HAS BEEN GOING ON - ANYWAY KEEP ON SWAPPING ! (AND LESS OF THOSE SHORT ONE LINE LETTERS AND MORE OF THE OLD WEIRD AND WONDERFUL LONG LETTERS ! MESSAGE TO: BIONIC/SBG/SPREADPOINT : HEY, WHERE ARE YOU ?? YOU'VE STILL GOT MY DISKS - THIS MAKES IT AT LEAST 4 TO 5 MONTHS !!!! COME ON AND SEND THEM BACK, YOU KEEP SAYING THAT YOU'LL SEND THEM BUT YOU NEVER DO ! I'M NOT SLAGGING YOU OFF BUT JUST A BIT PISSED OFF WITH THE LONG DELAY !. MESSAGE TO: ALIEN/NZC : IT LOOKED LIKE WE WERE GOING TO STOP SWAPPING BUT YOU DECIDED NOT TO - IS IT ALL FORGOTTEN NOW ??? IT WAS ONLY A TRIVIAL MATTER OF NO HOT STUFF (IT WAS JUST A SMALL PERIOD OF NO STUFF AT ALL.) WHAT DO THINK OF THE HOT STUFF NOW THEN ??? MESSAGE TO: THE CAZY PYTHON : HI THERE ! HOW'S THE GFX GOING ??? SEND SOME OF YOUR BEST STUFF AND PERHAPS YOU COULD DRAW A FEW LOGOS FOR US ?!?!? (WE'VE ALRERADY GOT AN EXCELLENT ARTIST BUT A FEW OTHER BITS FROM OTHER PEOPLE WOULD RELIEVE THE PRESSURE ON HIM.) SEND SOON ! MESSAGE TO: MASTER WINCHESTER : HI KURT ! HOPE THE POSTOFFICE IN BELGIUM HASN'T BEEN TOO HEAVY ON YOU - SO IT LOOKS LIKE WE CAN'T CHEAT ON THE STAMPS ANYMORE , WELL I'LL PAY FOR THE POSTAGE AT MY END FROM NOW ON. MESSAGE TO: CAD : SORRY I DO NOT DO FILM SWAPPING ABROAD, PERHAPS SOMETIME IN THE FUTURE (WHEN VIDEO CD'S ARE COMMON !) MESSAGE TO: ASH-AUSTRALIA : WHEN ARE YOU ARRIVING IN THE U.K. ?? (I SUPPOSE YOU'LL RING ME - YOU BETTER !) IS IT FOR GOOD NOW IN THE U.K. OR ARE YOU GOING BACK TO OZLAND ??? ANYWAY PERHAPS I'LL MEET YOU NOW SINCE YOU'RE IN THE U.K. (IF YOU WANT TO THAT IS !) MESSAGE TO: LAMO/CLOUD 9 : HOW'S IT GOING DOWN'UNDER ???? - - - - HOPE IT'S NOT TOO HOT ! (HERE IN THE U.K. IT'S MISERABLE). THANKS FOR THE UTIL DISK AND THE MEGA GREETINGS TO US ! ONE SLIGHT PROBLEM, I RECCOMEND THAT YOU DON'T USE THAT DEMO ON -- ANY DISK -. MESSAGE TO: RAY/PARADOX : SORRY MATE , I CANT GET YOU THE CIRCUIT DIAGRAM FOR THAT LITTLE FREE-PHONE-BOX !! BUT IT'S PRETTY SECRET STUF. PERHAPS I'LL MEET YOU SOMEDAY. MESSAGE TO: KEN : HEY HOPE WE DON'T GET ANY MORE DAMAGED DISKS THROUGH THE POST ! KEEP THEM GOING MATE ! MESSAGE TO: JOLIC/IT : WHERE ARE YOU ???? SEND SOON --------------------------- AND THAT IS THE END OF THE MESSAGES, SORRY TO THOSE PEOPLE WHO AREN'T THERE, LOOK AT YOUR LETTERS FOR YOU MESSAGES ! OK NOT MUCH ELSE TO SAY EXCEPT CONTACT ME AT: (SEND yyyyyyyyyyy OR zzzzzzzzzzz TO) THE TEKNICHIAN 5 PEAR TREE WAY GREAT SUTTON S.WIRRAL L66 2YP ENGLAND PHONE: U.K. 051-339-1851 }}}}}}B HI IT'S VELKRO HERE. HOW ARE YOU AMIGA FREAKS FEELING? WELL AM FEELING JUST WELL HARD. FIRST I MUST CONGRATULATE FOR READING THIS (AND THE REST) OF MY SCROLLTEXT, IN THIS MEGA DEMO DONE BY THE ONE AND ONLY . . . . . . . . . . . (WAIT FOR IT) . . . PHOTON. . . I MUST ADMIT, HE IS MEGA-COOOL WHEN IT COMES TO CODING BUT WE DO HAVE TROUBLE IN KEEPING HIM QUIET FOR MORE THAN 5 MINUTES. HE JUST KEEPS GOING ON AND ON AND ON AND ON AND ON. WELL ANYWAY I MUST'NT TALK TO MUCH ABOUT HOW BRILLANT HE IS OTHERWISE HIS HEAD WILL START TO SWELL AGAIN. OH NO IT'S TOO LATE HE'S STARTED... WELL ANYWAY, ALL YOU FREAKS MUST BE DYING IN SUSPENSE ON HOW I GOT MY WONDERFUL NAME??? WELL I'VE GOT ONE HELL OF A COOL HAIRCUT. SO COOL IT'S UNBELIEVABLE. ASK PHOTON, HE'LL TELL YOU HOW MEGA-COOL MY HAIRCUT IS. IN FACT TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, IT WAS PHOTON WHO THOUGHT UP OF THE NAME ONE DAY WHILE TRAVELLING ON THE BUS. WELL ENOUGH OF THIS BULLSHIT, LETS TALK ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE. HOW ABOUT COOKING? ONLY JOKING GUYS 'N' GIRLS TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, THE ONLY THING I CAN COOK IS CANNED SOUP. FOR ANYONE WHO DOES NOT KNOW HOW, FOLLOW THE FOLLOWING INSTRUCTIONS 1 - GET A CAN OF SOUP, ANY FLAVOUR WILL DO (PREFERABLY OXTAIL, MY FAVOURITE), THEN 2 - OPEN IT WITH A CAN OPENER. 3 - POUR SOUP INTO A BOWL AND FINALLY, 4 - LOB SOUP INTO MICROWAVE AND SET TIME. ANYONE WITHOUT A MICROWAVE, THEN TOUGH SHIT. I FEEL REALLY SORRY FOR YOU POOR PEOPLE. YOU DONT KNOW WHAT YOUR MISSING WITH VELKRO'S MEGA COOKING TIPS. WELL ANYWAY, ENOUGH ABOUT COOKING, OTHERWISE YOU FREAKS OUT THERE WILL BE THINKING THAT AM A PUFTER. BUT YOUR ALL WRONG BECOZ AM AS STRIAGHT AS A GOAL POST. ANYONE WHO THINKS THAT I SPELT BECOZ WRONG IS A FUCKING DICK SPLASH. IT'S JUST MY OWN WAY OF SPELLING BECAUSE. THAT REMINDS ME, ARE THERE ANY ARSENAL FANS OUT THERE? WELL IF THERE IS, THEN I WOULD JUST LIKE TO SAY THAT ARSENAL ARE FUCKING SHIT AND DON'T STAND A CHANCE OF WINNING ANYTHING. WHAT WITH THERE BORING FOOTBALL AND THE SHITTY RESULT AGAINST CHARLTON. HOW COULD THEY DRAW 2 - 2 WITH ONE OF THE CRAPPIST TEAMS IN THE ENGLISH FIRST DIVISION? WELL I MUST STATE THAT AM A LIVERPOOL FAN, THROUGH AND THROUGH. AND THERES NO ONE TO TOUCH THEM, NOT EVEN THE LIKES OF PSV EINHOVEN AND REAL MADRID. IF LIVERPOOL WERE IN EUROPE, THEY WOULD FUCKING THRASH THE BUTT OFF ANY TEAM. BUT WITH LIVERPOOL FANS, BEING SO HARD THE AUTHORITYS JUST CAN'T HANDLE US AND WON'T LET US BACK IN TO EUROPE. WELL, NOW THAT I'VE GOT THAT OFF MY HAIRY CHEST, I MUST GO AND HAVE A PISS. TO PEOPLE WHO DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, HERE'S A FEW PHRASES WITH THE SAME EXPRESSION. 1 - HAVING A JIMMY RIDDLE, 2 - GOING FOR A NUMBER ONE, 3 - TAKING A LEAK AND FINALLY, 4 - EMPTYING MY SPINKTER. NOW THAT'S IT, I MUST NOW GO AND "TAKE A LEAK". WON'T BE A MINUTE, SO PHOTON WILL KEEP YOU AMUSED FOR NOW UNTIL I RETURN. OK. BEFORE I GO OFF, COUNT THE NUMBER OF DOTS THAT FOLLOW. ................................................... NOW THAT AM BACK, DID ANYONE COUNT THE DOTS. THERE WAS INFACT 51 DOTS. WHAT? DID I HEAR YOU SCREAMING AND SHOUTING THAT THERE WERE ONLY 50 DOTS, WELL DID YOU DICK SPLASHS COUNT THE FULL STOP BEFORE THE DOTS APPEARED. WELL THEN. BEFORE I SWITCH OFF, I MUST TELL YOU THAT LEARNING TO CODE, THROUGH THE ASSISTANCE OF A MEGA MATE CALLED PPPHHOOTON. SORRY ABOUT THAT SLUR, BUT IT WAS BECAUSE, PHOTON WAS THREATING TO KNIFE ME IF I DID'T MENTION HIS NAME. OH NO, PHOTON'S HEAD IS STARTING TO SWELL AGAIN, AM SURE IT'S GOING TO EXPLODE ONE OF THESE DAYS. BUT I'VE GOT TO ADMIT, HE (OR IS IT SHE) DOES HELP OUT ALOT WITH MY CODING.... RIGHT, THATS IT FOR NOW, SO I'LL BETTER WRAP AROUND NOW. SEE YOUR'S. NEARLY FORGOT, WHILE READING THIS MESSAGE, A VIRUS HAS BEEN SLOWLY WRECKING YOUR DISKS. ONLY JOKING GUYS. DID YOU NEARLY PISS YOURSELVES? THIS IS SENTINEL(ALSO KNOWN AS TPM) AT THE KEYBOARD AND I GUESS I WILL HAVE TO WRITE SOMETHING INTERESTING FOR YOU ALL TO READ.......WELL IT IS 2:44 AM HERE IN THE UK, ALL THE LAMERS ARE SOUND ASLEEP AND MY JEAN-MICHEL JARRE COLLECTION IS DOING ITS BEST TO KEEP MY FAMILY AND NEIGHBOURS(JASON DONOVAN NOT INCLUDED...THANK GOODNESS) AWAKE. BY THE WAY, CONTACT US NOW IF ANYBODY HAS GOT -MUSIC FOR SUPERMARKETS- BY J.M. JARRE. THE WIND IS HOWLING OUTSIDE MY WINDOW BUT WHO CARES ANYWAY AS LONG AS I AM INDOORS! BAD NEWS... I HAD TO TIDY UP MY COMPUTER ROOM TODAY AND I HAD TO FILE ABOUT 265 DISCS INTO MY DISC BOXES. THEY WERE EVERYWHERE! BUT MAINLY WITHIN A FOOT OF MY DISC DRIVE(GOD WHAT A LAZY BASTARD I REALLY MUST BE I THOUGHT AS I FILED -SINBAD- INTO MY BOX, I HAVE NOT PLAYED THAT SINCE 1987!) GOOD NEWS... I FOUND A HALF EATEN PIZZA AND A CAN OF VINTAGE 1988 COKE, I WILL HAVE THEM LATER ON! I ALSO FOUND TWO POUNDS WORTH OF 18P STAMPS (NO FAKE UNS!), WHICH MEANS THAT I CAN BUY 2 OR 3 EXTRA PINTS TOMORROW NIGHT AT MY LOCAL PUB(YEAH!!!) WAKE UP YOU IDLE BASTARDS, I HAVE TAKEN THE TROUBLE OF WRITING THIS PIECE OF OUR SCROLLY TEXT FOR YOU, THE LEAST YOU COULD DO IS BLOODY WELL READ IT!....THANK YOU GOOD, NOW YOU ARE AWAKE, I WILL CONTINUE....... DID YOU KNOW THAT SAMANTHA FOX IS LEAVING BRITAIN BECAUSE SHE WANTS TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY??? PAH, BULLSHIT I THOUGHT, SHE MUST BE THINKING THAT ON A SMALL ISLAND LIKE BRITAIN, HER ENORMOUS TITS WOULD CAUSE AN IMBALANCE OF THE LAND MASS AND CAUSE LITTLE OLD BRITAIN TO CAPSIZE. WELL, WHY DOES SHE NOT LEAVE HER MONEY WITH ME IN CHESHIRE, AND LIVE IN LONDON. AT LEAST THE TWO MASSES ARE THE SAME, AND IF THE MONEY WEIGHS MORE, THEN I WILL SPEND A WAD OR TWO AND EVEN THINGS OFF A BIT. RIGHT, NOW I WILL SHOCK YOU...... BANG!!! NO SERIOUSLY THOUGH, MY BROTHER HAS GOT AN ATARI ST(SOFT BASTARD!) AND HE SWEARS IT IS BETTER THAN THE AMIGA. HOW COME IS IT THEN THAT I CATCH HIM USING MY AMIGA EVERY TIME I GET HOME FROM WORK? I WILL GET HIM TO DEFECT YET!!! BLOODY HELL, THAT WIND IS GETTING LOUDER.....I WILL SOON FIX THAT, SO UP GOES THE VOLUME. NOW I CANNOT HEAR THE WIND OR THE NEIGHBOURS HAMMERING ON THE WALL. I FEEL I MUST MENTION A COMPUTER SHOP NEAR ME CALLED - THE MICRO SHOP -, THEY ARE CRAP AND ALL THE STAFF STINK OF SWEAT! ALL THE SOFTWARE IS KEPT BEHIND GLASS CASES(LIKE A MUSEUM!), WELL WHEN I SAY ALL, I MEAN ALL TWELVE GAMES. (TALK ABOUT UNDERSTOCKED!) IN CASE YOU DID NOT KNOW, I AM SENTINEL AND I AM THE NEWEST MEMBER OF qrstuvw, I AM LEARNING 68000 AND ANY HELP IS APPRECIATED. I HAVE HAD MY AMIGA 500 SINCE COMMODORE SENT ME THE FIFTY POUND OFF VOUCHERS IN 1987 AND IT IS THE BEST COMPUTER ON THE MARKET. HELLO NORWAY, COME IN NORWAY. MY GOD!! I CANNOT EVEN GET AN ANSWER OUT OF MY WORLD MAP THESE DAYS! ARRRGH! DID I NOT WARN YOU ABOUT MY HUMOUR? IT LEADS THIS DOUBLE LIFE YOU SEE. I THINK I WILL BUY THAT NEW A590 HARDDISK FROM COMMODORE AS IT LOOK PRETTY DAMNED TRIFFIC! I WILL HAVE A LOOK AT IT AT THE COMMODORE SHOW IN LONDON THIS YEAR(1989), SEE YA THERE!!!! WELL, I THINK I WILL TELL YOU ABOUT MYSELF. I STARTED OUT WITH A GRANDSTAND SPORTS GAME CONSOLE AND AT THE TIME I THOUGHT IT WAS GREAT, THEN, I BOUGHT AN ATARI VCS 2600(REMEMBER THEM???) WITH WHICH, I HAD MANY A GOOD GAME OF DEFENDER, PAC MAN, RIVER RAID AND MISSILE COMMAND. IN 1982, I WAS GIVEN MY FIRST COMPUTER.......THE SPECTRUM 48K AND DID I HAVE PROBLEMS. I HAD TO GO ROUND TO MY FRIENDS HOUSE TO ASK HIM HOW TO CONNECT THE CASSETTE LEADS UPTO IT. (DO YOU ALL REMEMBER CASSETTE GAMES?) MY FIRST EVER GAME WAS MANIC MINER(A COPY!), FOLLOWED BY CHUCKIE EGG. I THEN GOT HOLD OF A GREAT NEW UTILITY CALLED BLACKBEARD, AND WITHIN A FEW DAYS, MY SOFTWARE COLLECTION WAS QUITE BIG!!! I THINK I WOULD STILL PLAY ATIC ATAC, LUNAR JETMAN AND JET SET WILLY TODAY! THEN I GOT A COMMODORE 64 AND ALSO A SPECTRUM 128, BUT THERE IS NO DOUBT WHICH OF THE TWO I MOST ENJOYED.........THE COMMODORE 64. I HAD MANY A GOOD GAME ON THE 64 AND THOUGHT THAT THERE WOULD NEVER BE A BETTER COMPUTER. THEN I BOUGHT AN ATARI 520ST AND I WAS IMPRESSED BY THE GRAPHICS AND DETAILED GAMES. ALL THE TIME THOUGH, I COULD NOT HELP FEELING THAT IT WAS NO WHERE NEAR AS GOOD IN THE SOUND DEPARTMENT AS THE 64. AT THAT TIME, I THOUGHT THAT THE SUN SHONE OUT OF MY ST DISC DRIVE AND THAT I OWNED THE BEST COMPUTER ON THE MARKET.......UNTIL I SAW AND HEARD THE COMMODORE AMIGA. SURE I HAD HEARD THE RUMOURS THAT IT WAS BETTER THAN THE ST, BUT I NEVER TOOK MUCH NOTICE. I SOLD MY 520ST TO MY BROTHER, AND BLEW MY PROFIT(YEAH, I KNOW IT IS WRONG TO MAKE A PROFIT OUT OF YOUR OWN FAMILY, BUT I JUST HAD TO!!) ON AN AMIGA 500 FROM A NOT SO WELL KNOWN COMPUTER SHOP IN CHESTER NEAR THE CATHEDRAL. I GOT MY AMIGA HOME AND SET IT UP, AND GATHERED MY FAMILY AROUND TO SEE IT AND HEAR IT. I SWITCHED ON AND LOADED THAT DEMO OFF THE WORKBENCH DISK (THE ONE WITH THE CHURCH MUSIC!) .....WE WAITED,.........AND WE WAITED.........AND I GRABBED MY GUARANTEE, FOLLOWED BY THE PIECE OF PAPER THAT INFORMED ME THAT AT THE REAR OF MY TV MODULATOR WAS A SMALL SWITCH LABELLED H AND L. IT WENT ON TO TELL ME THAT IF I FOUND THAT NO SOUND WAS BEING HEARD, THEN I SHOULD FLICK THIS SWITCH. SO I DID.........AND LO AND BEHOLD......MUSAK! MY FAMILY WERE MEGA IMPRESSED......EXCEPT FOR MY BROTHER, WHO LOOKED DECIDEDLY PISSED OFF AT THE PROSPECT OF OWNING THE ATARI ST. IN 1987, I JOINED A GROUP CALLED DREAM ACADEMY, AND WE WERE JUST LAMING AROUND THINKING THAT DISK EDITING SOMEONES NAME OUT OF A PROGRAM AND CHANGING IT TO DREAM ACADEMY OR DREAM FX WAS GREAT! THAT WAS UNTIL I REALISED THAT I SHOULD NOT BE DOING IT. BY JANUARY 1988, MY COLLECTION OF SOFTWARE WAS GETTING MASSIVE , AND I HAD A DABBLE AT AMIGA BASIC......FOR ABOUT HALF AN HOUR. SOMETIME DURING 1988, I FOUND A GREAT PROGRAM CALLED DEMOCREATOR V1.0, IT WAS MEGA!! IT MEANT THAT I COULD HAVE MY OWN PICCY, MY OWN SCROLLING MESSAGE AND A SAMPLED SOUND ASWELL. WOW......I USED IT ONCE! THEN I MET A GUY FROM BUCKLEY IN NORTH WALES CALLED PAUL WHO HAD LOADS OF NEW STUFF AND SAID HE WAS IN A GROUP CALLED DRAGONFORCE. AFTER A FEW WEEKS, HE OFFERED TO LET ME JOIN DRAGONFORCE AND HE SAID HE WOULD GIVE ANOTHER AMIGA IF I GAVE HIM A DECENT PICCY AND IF MY FRIEND WROTE HIM A DEMO. MY LUCK WAS IN I THOUGHT AS I WALKED HOME THAT NIGHT....THAT GUY WAS LETTING ME JOIN A PROPER GROUP, AND I WILL GET ANOTHER AMIGA. I WAS GETTING ALL THE LATEST SOFTWARE FROM HIM, SO HE MUST BE GOOD. HE LATER BECAME KNOWN TO ME AS -PAUL THE BULLSHIT-, BECAUSE I FOUND OUT THAT HE WAS GETTING MOST OF HIS NEW STUFF FROM LES IN WREXHAM, AND THAT HE KNEW NOTHING ABOUT PROGRAMMING AT ALL. OK, I THOUGHT....I WILL USE THIS IDIOT JUST TO GET NEW STUFF, WHICH I DID. I WENT TO HIS FLAT AND GRABBED NEW STUFF, AND ILENT HIM ABOUT 4 BOOKS ON C PROGRAMMING(WHICH I WAS TRYING TOPROGRAM IN AT THE TIME). HE SAID HE WOULD PHOTOCOPY THEM AND LET ME HAVE THEM BACK IN A WEEK. THREE MONTHS LATER, I STILL DID NOT HAVE THEM BACK, AND DISPITE MANY FOB OFFS AND FRUITLESS PHONE CALLS, I CALLED ON ONE OF MY REAL FRIENDS TO GIVE ME A LIFT TO PAULS FLAT, WHERE I THEN GOT MY BOOKS BACK FROM HIS WIFE.(PAUL WAS CONVENIENTLY NOT IN!) I HAVE NOT SPOKEN TO, OR HEARD FROM PAUL SINCE, BUT I HAVE HEARD THAT HESOLD HIS HOLD AMIGA 1000 SET UP TO TROLLIE AND TIM IN WREXHAM.I WAS THEN IN NO GROUP WHATSOEVER, SO I WAS JUST COLLECTING GAMES AND UTILITIES. I GOT SOME OF THEM FROM A COMPUTER CLUB, WHERE I MET UP WITH A BUNCH OF GUYS CALLED....PHOTON, TEKNICIAN, SNOWMAN AND VELKRO, WHO WERE GETTING A NEW GROUP TOGETHER. JUST TO MAKE SURE THEY WERE NOT LAMERS, I WAITED ABOUT THREE WEEKS, AND SURE ENOUGH, PHOTON IMPRESSED ME WITHHIS DEMOS AND TEKNICIAN AND SNOWMAN SHOWED OBVIOUS TALENTS IN THE SWAPPING AND GRAPHICS DEPARTMENT. TEKNICHIAN AND SNOWMAN ARE THE ORIGINAL MEMBERS OF STATIC DREAMS BY THE WAY. NOW, I AM TRYING TO CODE IN 68000 AND I AM SURE THAT I AM MAKING GOOD PROGRESS. I THEN ASKED THE GROUP, NOW CALLED qrstuvw IF I COULD JOIN THEM, AND AFTER THEY ALL SAID YES, I WAS IN. TO SHOW MY GOOD WILL, I BOUGHT A ROUND OF DRINKS FROM WHICH POINT, WE ARE ALL GOOD FRIENDS AND WE ARE ALL GETTING BETTER WITH THE AMIGA. THAT BRINGS MY STORY TO A CLOSE, AND I FEEL I MUST NOW SEND MY OWN PERSONAL GREETINGS TO: SAL OF VORTEX 42, ICE OF NORWEGIAN LIGHT FORCE, PENGUIN AND PANTHER 89, DIRE FIST OF THE GIANTS, DREADSTAR OF AVALANCHE, BONFIRE CREW, MARK E., BRUCE WOOD, ZERO THE HERO AND TO THE GUY FROM ADDONS. ALSO HI! TO HOWARD FROM BRISTOL, GREG, ROB, TROLLIE, MIKE AND TO CESTRIAN SOFTWARE FOR STOCKING THE DEVPAC V2.0 PACKAGE WHEN I NEEDED IT.(45 POUND ASWELL!!!)..... WELL THAT IS IT FROM ME AND IT IS NOW OVER TO SOMEONE ELSE MARC PANTHER, EX NEON, EX RAMTEK... THE REASON FOR LEAVING RAMTEK, LACK OF COMMUNICATION WITH OTHER MEMBERS (EXCLUDING SIMON AND JAGUAR)... AND NOW SOME MESSAGES TO SOME OF MY COOL CONTACTS: SHARKEY OF THE ZOKO TEAM, VERY NICE AND WELL DESIGNED DEMO, THE MUSIC WAS GREAT, ESPECIALLY THE SAMPLED PARTS. NO WONDER YOU CAME 1ST AT THE RAWHEAD/BROS/SPL PARTY IN ASKIN... ZIPPY OF ZARDEX, DONT FORGET TO MENTION qrstuvw IN YOUR GREETINGS AND PLEASE SEND SOON... COSY OF MAGNETIC FIELDS, WELL WHAT CAN I SAY BUT YOUR SENDS ARE FANTASTIC, KEEP UP THE FAST SENDINGS... TAG12 OF NEWSTYLE, WHERE ARE YOU??? REMEMBER HIP HOP RULZ... BILLY OF NEW BENCOR BROTHERS, THANKS FOR FOR EVERYTHING BILLY, WEVE BEEN TRADING SINCE THE C64 DAYZ AND STILL YOU SENDINGS ARE 100 PERCENT... NICK OF THE MIGHTY DRUIDS, IF ALL GOES WELL MY FRIEND AND IF I CAN GET AN INVITE TO THE S.A.E COPY PARTY, WE CAN FINALLY MEET... TURBO DISTRIBUTION OF L.A.D.S, YOU CERTAINLY LIVE UPTO YOUR NAME... BURGLAR OF IT! HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN ABOUT ME? PLEASE CONTACT ME AS SOON AS POSSIBLE... STP SOUND SYSTEM - SUBWAY AND DREAM TEAM, HOW DID THE PRIVATE PARTY IN AUSTRIA GO, DID YOU DO WELL? KEEP UP THE EXCELLENT SOUNDS AND I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS DEMO... NOW IF YOU ARE STILL READING, WELL ARE YOU??? NEXT THE PRIVATE GREETINGS GREETINGS GO TO THE REST OF THE MEMBERS OF qrstuvw - MADDY(MAZ) - SHARKEY THE ZOKO TEAM - COSY MAGNETIC FIELDS - NICK OF THE MIGHTY DRUIDS - SIMON - DAVE - JAGUAR RAMTEK - BILLY OF THE NEW BENCOR BROTHERS - TURBO DISTRIBUTION OF THE L.A.D.S - TAG12 OF NEWSTYLE - STEELHAWK OF AVALANCHE - STP SOUND SYSTEM:SUBWAY AND DREAM TEAM - BURGLAR OF IT! - ZIPPY OF ZARDEX - MIDI MAN OF HIGHCLASS AND TO PENGUIN AND TO ANYBODY ELSE WHO TRADE WITH qrstuvw... IF ANYBODY WHO IS READING THIS SCROLLTEXT HAS ANY SOUNDTRACKER INSTRUMENT DISKS, BUT PLEASE NOTE THAT THEY MUST BE NEW (NOT OLD), PLEASE GET IN TOUCH... THE LAST WORD FROM ME IS "RADICAL WRAP"... CONGRATULATIONS ON FINDING THE SECRET MESSAGE WELL THIS IS JUST TO SLAG OFF A GROUP OF PEOPLE AT COLLEGE, WHO CALL THEMSELVES "REAM", ORIGINALLY NAMED "RGB"... WELL LET ME TELL YOU A FEW FACTS ABOUT THESE LAMERS... 1 : THERE ARE 4 OF THEM 2 : NONE OF THEM CAN CODE 3 : THEY HAVE NO GRAFIXX SKILLS 4 : THEY HAVE NO MUZAK SKILLS 5 : THEY USE A DISK-DISECTOR TO SEARCH FOR TEXT, AND THEN TYPE IN THERE OWN STUFF (DEAD LAME!!!) 6 : THEY CAN JUST ABOUT USE THE CLI AND PD UTILITIES (E.G. SLIDESHOW) TO PRODUCE SHITTY UTILITY DISKS (WHICH THEY HAVE RIPPED FROM SOMEONE ELSE, EXCEPT IT'S GOT THERE NAME ON IT!!!) 7 : THEY CALL THEMSELVES THE "HORNIEST" GROUP ON THE AMIGA??? 8 : qrstuvw HATES THEM ALL, BUT THEY DON'T KNOW YET!!! HA!! HA!! IF YOU SEE ANYTHING (WHICH I DOUBT) WITH THERE NAME ON IT, IGNORE IT, COZ IT'S BULLSHIT, AND HAS PROBABLY BEEN DONE BY SOMEONE ELSE!!! ANYWAY NOW THAT'S OVER IT'S TIME TO RETURN YOU BACK TO THE MAIN SCROLL, SO SEE YOU AROUND SOMETIME...