HAYA HAYA HAYA BROTHERS AND SISTERS MUMS AND DADS THE CRUSADERS ARE BACK (AS USUAL) WITH A NEW RELEASE (AND OF COURSE ITS HOTTER THAT EVER BEFORE) THIS TIME WE THOUGHT WE WOULD TRY TO MAKE A NEW KIND OF RELEASE NAMELY A C H A R T D I S K ! WE ARE AWARE THAT WE'RE NOT THE FIRST TO DO THIS - I'M SURE A LOT OF YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN ENJOYING THE IPEC ELITE CHART CHAT, JUST LIKE WE HAVE. BUT WE THOUGHT THAT A NEW CHART, WITH MORE FREQUENT RELEASES, NICER PRESENTATION AND VOTING ABOUT MORE THINGS. ALSO, THIS CHART IS PUT TOGETHER WITH VOTES FROM LOADS AND LOADS OF AMIGA GROUPS, NOT JUST A FEW CHOSEN ONES. IN ADDITION TO THE VOTINGS, BEST THIS, WORST THAT, WE ALSO BRING YOU A COUPLE OF NICE ADD-INS: JOKE OF THE MONTH AND STORY OF THE MONTH. OK, BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHER, LET'S GIVE YOU THE WHO-DID-WHAT CREDITS ..... ORIGINAL IDEA OF CHARTING : IPEC ELITE ..... IDEA AND GENERAL LAYOUT : DR.AWESOME AND DR. M.D. CUB .... CODING : DR. M.D. CUB ..... GRAPHICS : SOME RIPPED, SOME BY DR.AWESOME ..... MUSIC : DR.AWESOME ....... OK GUYS, AS YOU MIGHT HAVE UNDERSTOOD BY NOW, WE ARE PLANNING TO RELEASE A NEW CHART EVERY SECOND MONTH, BUT FOR THAT WE NEED YOUR HELP! NOT MUCH FUN PUTTING ALL THE CHARTS TOGETHER OURSELVES IS IT? WELL LETS NOT WASTE VALUABLE SCROLLTEXT TIME WITH THIS SERIOUS SHIT LETS GET DOWN TO BUSINESS! BY THE WAY MY NAME IS DR. OUTTASIGHT AND IM THE SYSOP AT OUR VERY NICE BBS (AT LEAST I THINK SO....) NOW SOME INFORMATION ABOUT OUR BOARD..... LAST MONTH WE GOT A NEW COMPUTER FOR THE BBS, A COPAM 386 WITH A 120 MEGABYTE DISK AND 4 MEGABYTES OF MEMORY. WE ALSO INSTALLED A SECOND NODE (TELEPHONE LINE), SO NOW TWO USERS CAN USE THE BBS SIMULTANOUSLY! GOOD EYH ? SINCE OUR ELITE SECTION ISNT THE MOST FAMOUS IN THE WORLD, WE PLAN TO GET BIGGER AND BIGGER ON PD SOFTWARE, SO IF YOU NEED A SPECIAL PD PROGRAM OR A NON PD UTILITY OUR BOARD IS THE PLACE TO CALL. AND NOW THE NUMBERS... +47-6-810881 AND +47-6-810864 TOO FAST ? (WELL THEN BUY AN ATARI FOR CRIST SAKE) OK ONCE MORE +47-6-810881 AND +47-6-810864 ENOUGH ABOUT THAT. ANYONE FOR SOME GOOD OLD FASION BULLSHIT ? OK HERE GOES.... YOU POOR FELLAS YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR A NEW CRUSADERS RELEASE THIS LONG AND ALL YOU GET IS A LOUSY CHART DISK ? BLAAAHH HAVE NO FEAR HAVE WE EVER DISSAPOINTED YOU GUYS ? NOOOOOO NOT THIS TIME EITHER! IN A FEW DAYS YOU WILL PROBABLY RECEIVE THE LATEST MUSIC DISK FROM US, THAT'S SOMETHING EYH ? WHY DRESS UP AS A CAT AND WALK ON ALL FOUR TROUGH A KENNEL WHEN ITS ONLY DAYS LEFT ???? WHY PAINT YOUR BODY BLACK AND ORDER A BLACK RUSSIAN AT A BAR FULL OF REDNECKS WHEN THERE ARE ONLY A FEW MINUTES LEFT ???! WHY DRESS UP AS A RAT AND JUMP ON A TRUCK ON ITS WAY TO A TAMPONG FACTORY ??? WHY GRAB A T-SHIRT WITH ATARI ON IT AND GO TO AN AMIGA COPYPARTY ????? WHY DRESS UP AS AN AFRICAN ELEPHANT, POLISH YOUR TEETH AND GO TO AFRICA ??? WHY ? WHY ? W H Y ? NO SENSE IN COMITTING SUICIDE WHEN THE LATEST PRODUCTIONS FROM CRUSADERS ARE NEARLY IN YOUR POCKET ? JUST NOW I THOUGHT THAT A GOOD IDEA WAS TO CHANGE MY NAME FROM DR. OUTTASIGHT TO THE JOKER BETTER YET, DR. OUTTASIGHT - THE JOKER HMMM THAT SOUNDS GOOOOOD OK CONSIDER IT DONE !! HARF HARF ARGHHAAA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HARF HO HO HO HO HA A A A A A A . .. . . . AND NOW FROR THE GREETINGS (A-Z ORDER)..... ABANDON ACCESSION ACES / PIRAHNAS ACCUMULATORS ACTION FORCE AHEAD AMIGA INDUSTRIES ANTARCTICA APACHE AVENGER AVIREX AXXIS AZE THE BAND BOLERO THE BOZZ BRAINSTORM THE CARTEL CCS CHAOS CLAN CLONES COMPLEX CRITTERS CROWDED HOUSE CRYPTOBURNERS DDC DEFJAM / SPREADPOINT DEXION DIGITECH ENTITY EPSILON ESCAPE EXEC FLASH PROD. FLASH TEAM FRAXION FREEDOM FORCE FUSION FUTURE GARFIELD AND BEATE THE GATE GUARDIANS OF DOOM THE GIANTS HAAREK HELICON HYPNOSIS IBB IMP 666 IT IVORY MAGICAL MAGNETIC FIELDS METALLIANS MODESTY MR. POWER NEMESIS NORTHSTAR / SILENTS NOVA PARANOIMIA PHAZE 101 PHOBIA PHOENIX QUARTEX QUICKSILVER RED SECTOR INC. SAE OF SCOOPEX SCEPTRES SETROX SHADOWLIGHT SILVER HAWKS SPADGE 17BIT STORM SUPPLY TEAM SUPREME SYNTAX 3001 TARTAN ARMY TEAM-X UK TOP SWAP TRASH AND TOP BOYS TRILOGY TWI VISION VISION FACTORY VISUAL ARTS WIZZCAT ZAREX X-MEN UK LADIES AND GENTLEMEN : STORY OF THE MONTH ! ------------------------------------------- A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO SOME FRIENDS OF MINE AND I VISITED LONDON. ONE OF THE FIRST NIGHTS WE DECIDED TO VISIT A NIGHTCLUB CALLED THE EMPIRE. IT WAS A MONDAY NIGHT SO IT WASN'T EXCACTLY CROWDED, BUT THERE WERE NEVERTHELESS SOME GOURGEOUS LOOKING FEMALES LURKING AROUND. THERE WAS IN PARTICULAR ONE WHO LOOKED INTERESTING. AND I DECIDED TO GIVE IT A SHOT. AFTER HAVING WAITED FOR AGES FOR THE DJ TO PLAY SOME SOFT SONG, HE FINALLY GOT AROUND TO IT. I LURKED UP TO THE GAL AND ASKED WITH A SOFT SENSITIVE VOICE: 'WOULD YOU LIKE TO DANCE?'. SHE STUDIED ME CLOSELY AND THEN GRANTED ME A DANCE. I MOVED CLOSE TO HER AS THE SPEAKERS BURSTED OUT SOME SLOW LOVE SONG. IT WAS R E A L L Y BEGINNING TO GET INTERESTING AS THE CHICK LOOKED AT ME AND ASKED: 'WHERE ARE YOU FROM?' 'I'M A SWEDE', I TOLD HER. THEN IN A MOMENT OF BRAIN MALFUNCTION I DECIDED TO TRY TO IMPRESS HER BY GUESSING HER HOME COUNTRY, SO BEFORE I HAD THOUGHT IT OVER MORE CLOSELY I BURSTED OUT: 'AND YOU'RE GERMAN, RIGHT?' I HADN'T EVEN FINISHED THE SENTENCE WHEN THE GIRL LET GO OF ME AS IF I WAS BURNING HOT. 'DO I LOOK LIKE SOME SAUSAGE-BREATH FRITZ-GAL TO YOU?', SHE SHOUTED WITH A LOUD COCKNEY-VOICE. SHE SURE DID TO ME. BUT HER TIGHTENED FIST AND RED FACE TOLD MED SHE WASN'T, SO I WISELY KEPT MY MOUTH SHUT AND GOT THE HELL OUT OF THERE AS FAST AS MY FEET COULD TAKE ME. I'D LEARNED A LESSON: IF YOU WONNA SCORE WITH A GIRL, DON'T CALL HER GERMAN!!! STORY TURNED IN BY THE BEAST OF T.G.T. THANKS MATE ! W E L C O M E ! TO THE OFFICIAL CRUSADERS EUROCHART TOP TEN ! THIS IS THE FIRST ISSUE, RELEASED NOVEMBER 1ST 1989. EVERY SECOND MONTH WE WILL RELEASE AN UPDATED VERSION WITH NEW RESULTS. THAT MEANS THAT THE NEXT CHART WILL BE OUT 1ST OF JANUARY 1990. BEFORE WE LET YOU LOOSE INTO THE CHART THERE ARE A FEW POINTS WE FEEL SHOULD BE MENTIONED. FIRST OF ALL, PLEASE NOTE THAT THE CRUSADERS ARE N O T IN ANY WAY RESPONSIBLE FOR THE RESULTS IN THE EUROCHART. THE VOTES HAVE BEEN COLLECTED FROM ABOUT 300 GROUPS ALL OVER EUROPE, AND ALL WE DO IS COLLECT THEM, ADD THEM TOGETHER AND BRING YOU THE RESULTS. SO, IF YOU'RE UNLUCKY ENOUGH TO BE ON TOP OF THE LAMERS LIST, DON'T BLAME US, BLAME EUROPE ! IN ORDER TO BE ABLE TO MAKE THE EUROCHART AS ACCURATE AS POSSIBLE, WE NEED AS MANY VOTES AS WE CAN GET. SO IF YOU WANT TO INFLUENCE THE RESULTS, GRAB A PEN, WRITE DOWN YOUR VOTES AND SEND THEM TO ANY MEMBER OF THE CRUSADERS. IF YOU DON'T HAVE AN ADDRESS TO SEND IT TO, TRY THIS ONE : CRUSADERS, "CHART", STAVIKBAKKEN 3, 1472 FJELLHAMAR, NORWAY. THERE IS ONE IMPORTANT THING ABOUT THE VOTING, THOUGH. YOU CAN VOTE FOR WHOEVER YOU WANT, BUT YOU ARE N O T ALLOWED TO VOTE FOR YOURSELF OR ANY OTHER MEMBER OF YOUR GROUP. IF YOU VOTE FOR YOURSELF, THE VOTE WILL BE IGNORED. WE HOPE YOU WILL ENJOY THE OFFICIAL CRUSADERS EUROCHART TOP TEN. SEE YOU IN 2 MONTHS! NOW, PRESS THE "S" KEY TO START THE FUN !!!! LADIES AND GENTLEMEN : JOKE OF THE MONTH ! ------------------------------------------ TWO TRAVELLING HUNTERS WERE CAPTURED BY A WILD TRIBE IN AFRICA, AND BROUGHT TO THE TRIBES VILLAGE. THERE, THEY WERE TIED UP TO A LARGE COLOUMN AWAITING THEIR DOOM... AFTER A WHILE, THE MEDICINE-MAN OF THE TRIBE CAME OVER TO THE FIRST HUNTER AND SHOUTED : " DEATH OR MOUMBAH ! " WELL, THE HUNTER DIDNT KNOW WHAT MOUMBAH MEANT, BUT HE CERTAINLY DIDN'T WANT TO DIE, SO HE SAID : MOUMBAH! ALL THE MEN IN THE TRIBE SMILED, UNTIED THE MAN, AND BROUGHT HIM TO THE CENTRE OF THE VILLAGE. THERE, THEY PERFORMED ALL KINDS OF PERVERTED SEXUAL ACTS AT THE POOR HUNTER, WHILE THE REST OF THE TRIBE STOOD AROUND SHOUTING: MOUMBAH! MOUMBAH! MOUMBAH! AFTER TWO HOURS, THE HUNTER COULD NEITHER SPEAK NOR MOVE, SO THEY LEFT HIM. AND THEN THE MEDICINE MAN TURNED TO THE OTHER HUNTER, AND ASKED HIM THE SAME QUESTION : " DEATH OR MOUMBAH ! ". HE SAW HOW BAD THEY HAD TREATED HIS MATE, SO HE PREFERRED DEATH, AND CRIED OUT : "DEATH!" THE MEN IN THE VILLAGE STARTED LAUGHING WILDLY, WHILE THE REST OF THE TRIBE CHANTED : DEATH BY MOUMBAH! DEATH BY MOUMBAH! DEATH BY MOUMBAH! JOKE TURNED IN BY EXCALIBUR OF ESCAPE THANKS MATE! CHART OF BEST MUSICIAN: ----------------------- 1. DR. AWESOME - CRUSADERS 2. WALKMAN - IT 3. MUSIC FROM 'LED STORM' 4. SCS - TCC / RED SECTOR 5. BUG - SUBWAY 6. DR. M.D. CUB - CRUSADERS 7. CHRIS HUELSBECK 8. FRED HAHN 9. SKEFF - IQ- 10. MARK II - QUADLITE CHART OF WORST MUSIC: --------------------- 1. IVORY 2. MUSIC FROM 'PAPERBOY' 3. BITMAN - WHAT 4. BYTERAPERS 5. MUSIC FROM 'POSTMAN PAT' 6. MUSIC FROM 'LEISURE-SUIT LARRY' 7. AWKIE - CLONES 8. MUSIC FROM 'HIGH STEEL' 9. MUSIC FROM 'MR. HELI' 10. TACS - AVENGER CHART OF BEST GAME: ------------------- 1. XENON II - MEGABLAST 2. KICK-OFF 3. RICK DANGEROUS 4. NEW ZEALAND STORY 5. DUNGEON MASTER 6. ELITE 7. SIM CITY 8. PORTS OF CALL 9. BLOODWYCH 10. POPULOUS CHART OF WORST GAME: -------------------- 1. SNAKE 68000 2. ROBOCOP 3. INVADERS 4. DATA STORM 5. DOUBLE DRAGON 6. RENEGADE 7. GILBERT 8. POSTMAN PAT 9. JAWS 10. LICENCE TO KILL CHART OF BEST UTILITY: ---------------------- 1. DISKMASTER 2. XCOPY 2.0 3. SEKA 3.0 4. NOISETRACKER 5. POWERPACKER 6. DELUXEPAINT III 7. A-MAX 8. DISKSALV 9. DISCOVERY 10. VIRUS EXPERT CHART OF WORST UTILITY: ----------------------- 1. DISKDOCTOR 2. IFF SAMPLES CONVERTER 3. TRANSFER 24 4. HERMIT 5. PAGESETTER 6. NORTHSTAR VIRUSKILLER 7. TIMEBOMBER 8. RAZOR KICK RESET 9. DEVPAC 10. XCOPY 2.0 CHART OF BEST DEMO: ------------------- 1. RED SECTOR MEGADEMO 2. UNIQUE - UNIVERSAL PICTURES 3. CRUSADERS - FREEKD OUT 4. PHENOMENA - LOST IN SPACE 5. PHOENIX MEGADEMO II 6. REBELS - TRAGIC MAGIC 7. SCOOPEX MEGADEMO 8. QUADLITE MEGADEMO 9. LEVEL 4 DEMO 10. WILD COPPER MEGADEMO CHART OF LAMEST DEMO: --------------------- 1. IVORY 2. SPECTRES 3. IKS 4. CRIMES 5. ARGON INTRO 6. TAMPAX UK 7. TEC 8. PANTHERS 9. TRAX CREW 10. TEAM-X MEGA CHART OF BEST GRAPHICS: ----------------------- 1. GRAPHICS FROM 'BEAST' 2. DR. C - TCC / RED SECTOR 3. GRAPHICS FROM 'DRAGONS LAIR' 4. GRAPHICS FROM 'XENON II' 5. RAINMAKER - QUACKERS 6. RAZMO - KEFRENS 7. HENRI PULLA 8. GRAPHICS FROM VISION MEGADEMO II 9. J.O.E. SLIDESHOW 10. DARK LORD - WIZARDS INC. CHART OF LAMEST GRAPHICS: ------------------------- 1. IVORY 2. SPECTRES 3. GRAPHICS FROM 'HARD 'N' HEAVY' 4. GRAPHICS FROM 'RENEGADE' 5. ARGON 6. GRAPHICS FROM 'BALLY' 7. GRAPHICS FROM 'QIX' 8. X-BEAT 9. GRAPHICS FROM 'QUASAR' 10. GRAPHICS FROM 'WAR MACHINE' CHART OF BEST BBS: ------------------ 1. ACCUMULATORS 2. QUARTEX 3. CRUSADERS 4. CHECKPOINT CHARLIE 5. CRYSTAL PALACE 6. AMNESIA 7. VISION FACTORY 8. THRUST 9. DAMAGE INC. 10. ORACLE CHART OF BEST GROUP: -------------------- 1. QUARTEX 2. CRUSADERS 3. RED SECTOR 4. VISION FACTORY 5. ACCUMULATORS 6. BLACK MONKS 7. BAMIGA SECTOR ONE 8. SHARE AND ENJOY / SCOOPEX 9. PARANOIMIA 10. THE BAND CHART OF LAMEST GROUP: ---------------------- 1. IVORY 2. THE OUTSIDER 3. POWERMIX 4. HORIZON 5. GOGO INC. 6. ALIENS 7. T.A.C. 8. DISKNET 9. ACIDFORCE UK 10. AVALANCHE CHART OF BEST ALBUM ('REAL' MUSIC): ----------------------------------- 1. PRINCE - 'BATMAN' 2. RUSH - 'A SHOW OF HANDS' 3. GUNS 'N' ROSES - 'APETITE FOR DESTRUCTION' 4. METALLICA - 'JUSTICE FOR ALL' 5. DIRE STRAITS - 'BROTHERS IN ARMS' 6. J.M. JARRE - 'ESSENTIAL' 7. DEF LEPPARD - 'HYSTERIA' 8. NENEH CHERRY - 'RAW LIKE SUSHI' 9. INXS - 'KICK' 10. CROWDED HOUSE - 'THE TEMPLE OF LOW MEN' CHART OF WORST ALBUM ('REAL' MUSIC): ----------------------------------- 1. RICK ASTLEY - 'WHENEVER YOU NEED SOMEBODY' 2. SAMANTHA FOX - (LATEST ALBUM) 3. MADONNA - 'LIKE A PRAYER' 4. FRANKLIN - 'BOMBADILLA DAYS' 5. PRINCE - 'BATMAN' 6. MOTLEY CRUE - 'DR. FEELGOOD' 7. A-HA - 'HUNTING HIGH AND LOW' 8. WACKO JACKO - 'BAD' 9. ROY ORBISON - 'MYSTERY GIRL' 10. THE CURE - 'DISINTEGRATION' CHART OF BEST SINGLE ('REAL' MUSIC): ------------------------------------ 1. PRINCE - 'BATDANCE' 2. KOTO - 'DRAGONS LEGEND' 3. PINK FLOYD - 'LEARNING TO FLY' 4. MADONNA - 'LIKE A PRAYER' 5. MARTIKA - 'TOY SOLDIER' 6. AEROSMITH - 'LOVE IN AN ELEVATOR' 7. PRINCE - 'PARTYMAN' 8. MANOWAR - 'HOLY WAR' 9. LIL LOUISE - 'FRENCH KISS' 10. BLACK BOX - 'GOTTA GET UP' CHART OF WORST SINGLE ('REAL' MUSIC): ------------------------------------- 1. FRANKLIN - 'BOMBADILLA LIFE' 2. JASON DONNAVAN - 'SEALED WITH A KISS' 3. BROS - 'I OWE YOU NOTHING' 4. JIVE BUNNY - 'SWING THE MOOD' 5. MADONNA - 'LIKE A PRAYER' 6. FINE YOUNG CANNIBALS - 'SHE DRIVES CRAZY' 7. AVALANCHE - 'JOHNNY COME HOME' 8. MEL & KIM - 'SHOWING OUT' 9. A-HA - 'TAKE ON ME' 10. SABRINA - 'BOYS, BOYS, BOYS' CHART OF BEST MUSIC VIDEO: -------------------------- 1. PRINCE - 'PARTYMAN' 2. PETER GABRIEL - 'SLEDGEHAMMER' 3. DIRE STRAITS - 'MONEY FOR NOTHING' 4. PRINCE - 'BATDANCE' 5. ALICE COOPER - 'POISON' 6. SKID ROW - 'YOUTH GONE WILD' 7. IRON MAIDEN - 'SEVENTH SON OF A SEVENTH SON' 8. U2 - 'RATTLE AND HUM' 9. ZZ TOP - 'ROUGH BOY' 10. BOBBY BROWN - (FROM GHOSTBUSTERS II) CHART OF WORST MUSIC VIDEO: --------------------------- 1. EDELWEISS - 'BRING ME EDELWEISS' 2. BROS - 'PUSH' 3. PRINCE - 'BATDANCE' 4. FINE YOUNG CANNIBALS - 'GOOD THING' 5. RICK ASTLEY - 'WHENEVER YOU NEED SOMEBODY' 6. PAUL MCCARTNEY - 'THIS TIME' 7. A-HA - 'STAY ON THESE ROADS' 8. MADONNA - 'LIKE A PRAYER' 9. THE THE - 'THE BEATEN GENERATION' 10. JIVE BUNNY - 'SWING THE MOOD' CHART OF BEST MOVIE: -------------------- 1. THE LAST CRUSADE 2. BATMAN 3. LETHAL WEAPON II 4. 007 - LICENCE TO KILL 5. NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET IV 6. DIE HARD 7. HELLRAISER II 8. GHOSTBUSTERS II 9. DANGEROUS LIAISONS 10. A FISH CALLED WANDA CHART OF WORST MOVIE: --------------------- 1. BATMAN 2. TULIPS 3. POLICE ACADEMY 6 4. RAMBO III 5. FLESHDANCE 6. BAT 21 7. EVIL DEAD II 8. JAWS III 9. HOTEL ST. PAULI 10. OVEREXPOSED