³CcAaLlLl MmEe...
                          ¢CcAaLlLl MmEe...
                                           ³...NnOoTt!
                                           ¢...NnOoTt!

                      ²| A nightmare from the real life |

'ehh ha ha, is Morten home, ha ha?' 'Are you sure that you don't mean Martin?'
i gladly respond when i regonize the Swedish accent. 'Ehhh, yeah Martin he he,
cool' - There isn't anything better than your scene-contacts calling you, it's
really cosy to TALK with the people behind all those letters. Therefor i was
happily suprised when i picked up the phone late a workday... Well, that was
untill the guy continued: 'Well ehh, he he I'm Slayer / Scoopex, he he, and i
heard some rumours about you wanna' join, he he cool' 'ME joining Scoopex?', i
asked not believing my own ears, 'Yeahh, he he, i heard from the organiser
that...' 'Hold on a second, you're not Slayer!', some of my friends know me
under the name Sherlock, that's actullay why my brain figured it all out that
fast. But after i had responded to the statement from the drunk swede there
were quite some silence in the other end of the telephone, or almost silence
because i could hear about two child voices in the background discussing fast
in Swedish on what they should do... I had simply figured out that there were
not Slayer, and that way some of the fun went away (i guess). After a minnute
or two: 'Why not?', but i was fast and aggresive, maybe a bit stupid too, so i
shouted, 'Why?' Personally i don't think it was quite a good anwser, but it
really seemed to knock over the Swedes - witch only tells about their high
amountof intelligence.
  Then they started to say a whole lot in Swedish wuite fast, i'm convinced
that it wasen't very sweet (and it didn't sound nice either> Knulla Pissa i
Parken Knæka brød<) but unfortunely i didn't understand i single bit of it
(even thou i belive to hear the words "Fire Fire" mingled with "Cool, he he" in
the background)
  So they hang up, i guess they had used all of their entire vocabylarium. Hmm,
that was that, i thourgt and continued with my homework, but i wasen't...

²(¹quite scary ehh?²)

Later on they called me twice, this time they were quite limited crying words
like: Looser, and nothing more actullay, then the #lead vocal# started to tell
me about some complicated matter (atleast i sounded complicated) in a language
who was a pale imitation of english, so i asked if they were better in
French... You know i am a understanding fellow, if the guy would express
himself i would be there at his side to listen to his problems, but no! To the
question he screamed 'NOOOO, he he cool' or something similar and hang up...
Again! Once more they called me, said some naughty Swedish words(?) and hang
up. But thanx god, when the clock passed 22 it stopped, i guess that there
parents came home and they should go to bed. (Tidligt op og tidligt i seng, det
er godt for en ²LILLE ¹dreng.)

All in all i think it all was quite ridicules, i don't know who called me -
witch i'm a bit pissed of about, and i'll proberly never know... But honestly
HOW amusing could it be to call for 50 kroner to tell people that you are
Slayer / SCX and ask if they wanna' join? Take you self together - i really
thourght that these kinds of things had stopped for all sceners long time ago.
Damn it, i could ofcause use lotsa' diskspace telleing about how
imature,childish and lame that is... And i will, no ofcause not, but please>
TRY to behave like grown ups, that way teh scene will be alot more enjoyable...
Hmm, who am i actullay talking to? The folks who did it will proberly get a
kick out of this article (if someone would like to help them translating the
English stuff) and all you others will nod on your head and move on to the next
article. perhaps except the small lamers who would like someone to write an
article about them, they can just call Pearl... NO THANKS!

'It can be fun writting, even if it won't get published'
Quate> ²Lindhart ¹& ²Ringhoff,
publisherhouse.


written in anger by a sleepy,

   ---Pearl-/-Passion---
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          14/12
           \ /
          a1994




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¼                                                                      !"#$%&'(